Geeks Being Bullied

GEEKS BEING BULLIED

By Lee A Farruga

Bullying is universal, but is being a geek the main reason one gets bullied. Are geeks bullied more today or is it the older geeks who had it the worse. Is being a geek the real reason why one gets bullied?

I started my research by simply Googling “bullying geeks in school”. While I got a lot of hits on being a geek who bullies and how not to bully at comic-cons, there were still a few articles I found whose titles seemed to be generally what I was looking for, but as I found, well, not so much.

“Geeks Guide To Not Getting Bullied” (sparknotes.com, April 24, 2012) Their suggestions were aimed mainly at not antagonizing those lower on the IQ scale. For example, don't say a test was easy, or mention you got a high score, or correct someone's grammar. Their absolute worse advice was “Pretend to be Dumb” - yes they actually said that. There was no mention of gamers or cosplay, or don't read your comics in public. Most comments to the article said that their popular kids in school were the smart kids, so these didn't appy at all.

“Six Lessons Learned From Being Bullied as a Geek Kid” (i09.com, Dec 7, 2012) Again, the post was more about generally nasty people bullying someone they perceive as different, but no specific mention of anyone doing anything “geeky” that led to getting bullied. The article did, however, have some very good tips and discussion in the comments.

“Geeks Don't Get Bullied Simply For Being Geeks” (kotaku.com, Feb 1, 2013) This article was much more realistic and made a lot of sense. It said that being passionate about something (the definition of “geek”) and being honest about it is what makes you vulnerable, whether it's comics, science, dancing or anything really – geeky or not. They also mention gender and homophobia. Geeky things like games, comics, etc. operate outside of gender roles – girls playing shooter games, boys reading instead of playing football.

In the Kotaku post they also mention another article “Why Geeks Get Bullied (Not Necessarily for Being Geeks)” in The Atlantic, Jan 31, 2013. It said that there are other factors that contribute to being bullied and one of those is “Cultural Capital”. They define it as having things beyond finances that can influence social mobility. One of the class markers is being intellectual/nerdy/geeky. This becomes a sign of privilege to some. The bullies take offense to the idea of being left behind. One example of this comes from Diana Vick – steampunk artist and founder of Steamcon in Seattle. She remembers a boy who said he needed to bring along a dictionary on their dates just to understand her. That relationship obviously didn't last.

What I found from the sum total of the information I looked at was that they all said the same thing – people will always attack those they perceive as different. It doesn't matter whether you're a geek, your skin colour is different from the majority, or you like to sing, there are those who need a scapegoat and will grasp at anything they can.

With being a geek becoming mainstream today, there is a lot less bullying for that reason specifically. My girls talked to friends about this subject and they all said their schools have anime and gaming groups now. My girls have never experienced being bullied simply for being a geek.

While there still is and, sadly, probably always will be bullying, we've come a long way in helping to educate about and prevent it. In Ottawa, every school now has a policy to combat bullying. As well, we are lucky to have groups like Jer's Vision, a wonderful anti-bullying and awareness organization. One of their wonderful people provided me with the following stats on bullying.

(Data current as of 2014 from Prevnet- Promoting Relationships and Eliminating Violence Network)

• 89% of teachers say violence and bullying is a serious problem in schools, and list it as their top concern out of six offered options
• 75% of high school-aged kids say they have been affected by bullying
• 71% of teachers say they have intervened in bullying incidents, but only 25% of students say that teachers have intervened
• The victim's peers are present in 90% of bullying cases. Studies show that when peers or bystanders step in, the bullying stops within 10 seconds.
• 1 in 5 teenagers have been cyberbullied
• Girls are victimized by sexual harassment and emotional aggression more frequently than boys
• Girls tend to begin using social forms of bullying at earlier ages than boys (9-10 years old on average)
• Physical bullying declines with age, and verbal, social, and cyber bullying tend to increase between the ages of 11 and 15

These stats may be a little depressing, but the lady who provided them also told me this lovely story and I think it's a great counterpoint. “A few years ago, I interviewed a lot of young people to write a show called "The Bullying Monologues". One young lady told me she experienced horrible bullying because her family was poor-- kids would spit on her, throw snowballs with rocks in them, etc. She was close to ending her life, when her family acquired a computer for the first time. Since she loved comics books and fantasy, she was finally able to connect with fellow geeks, and realized she was not alone. It gave her hope and helped her through the tough time. She credited geek culture with helping her mental health.”

Here's how I want to finish this post – a little girl at the 2013 Denver Comic-con asked Wil Wheaton how he used to deal with being called a nerd when he was a kid – his response is perfect.

Lee A. Farruga is known as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy, and loves to help people achieve their goals, whatever that might be. She can also be found reviewing books, games, movies and more at geekygodmother.ca. Also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk, Lee created and manages Steampunk Canada. When she finds spare time, Lee does background acting for television and movies, and enjoys geeky activities with family and friends.

Capital Geek Girls Ladies Night Wrap-Up

CAPITAL GEEK GIRLS AND THE COMIC BOOK SHOPPE LADIES' NIGHT

By Emily Plunkett

Although the sign said closed, confused onlookers into the Bank St. Comic Book Shoppe last Sunday saw the store buzzing with business – with one very distinct feature.

Hosted by Capital Geek Girls, the Comic Book Shoppe held its fourth ladies-only night.  The store was open after hours on August 10 for female and female-identified shoppers.  While participants browsed through the store for a special find, they could also have their fortune read by the Rune Dice, enjoy Cici and Co. donuts or participate in open gaming.

Participants Emily Drohan, Ameila Bone and Zeyna Bnourbianbachi were drawn to the event by the promise of a panel presented by Ottawa cosplayed and CGG contributor Critical Miss. They were not disappointed.

“I'm breaking out the sewing machine and I'm really bad at it,” said Bnourbianbachi, a budding cosplayer.  “I was really interested in [learning how to] save money.”

Between manicures and presentations, ladies were also treated to the ongoing August birthday sales as presented by the Comic Book Shoppe.

Store manager, Angie Kuehl says that events like girls-only shopping creates a distinct community.

“We felt the need to create a safe environment that female and female identified cliental could actually be comfortable in the space and not feel judged by knowing and not knowing [the products].” She said.

“We still get a bit of a geeky atmosphere going. There is a lot of us geek girls [around] that warrants this. It's so successful,”

Kuehl says she is unsure when the next ladies-only event will take place, but one thing is for certain, word will get out and the event will continue to grow.

“It's one of those things where there's a lot of it in Ottawa, but you’re not really aware of it, unless you're already a part of it,” said Bone.  “So it's nice to kind of get that hand that's coming out and [saying] ‘Join us, it's not that much of an insider's club.’”  

Editor's note: We would like to thank everyone  who volunteered and attended ladies night. It was a great time and we loved chatting with those of you that we met.  CGG contributor Lee A. Farruga also attended and wrote about her experiences here.  

Emily Plunkett is a recent graduate of the journalism diploma program at Algonquin College. As a freelancer, she’s written for the Ottawa Star and the Sarnia Observer. Notorious for being a Beatlemaniac, a record collector and something nobody can really put a finger on, she enjoys a good Sunday afternoon with CBC Radio chatting away, her knitting in hand and her cat, Levon, snoozing at the end of the bed.

Remembering Robin Williams

We here at Capital Geek Girls  were greatly saddened to hear of the passing of Robin Williams. A few of the writers were able to put that sadness into words to share.

Credit: Eva Rinaldi 

MARIE VICTORIA ROBERTSON

A good friend of mine posted a very apropos quote when the news broke about Robin Williams’ passing:

“A clown needn’t be the same out of the ring as he has to be when he’s in it. If you look at photographs of clowns when they’re just being ordinary men, they’ve got quite sad faces.” –Enid Blyton, Five Go Off in a Caravan

I think that sums up exactly why this death is such a shock. My favourite Robin Williams movies were always the funny (or at least, light-hearted) ones—Hook, Aladdin, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jumanji, etc. While I was never a huge fan of his stand-up, I know so many people who just loved his manic onstage energy and I can see why. 

He was funny, and he made so, so many people happy. There is something incredibly sad about a comedy icon fighting such severe depression that he felt suicide was his only way to find peace. How could someone who so easily brightened everyone’s lives be feeling so much darkness himself?

We can only hope he finally found his peace. His memory and his movies will always be with us.

LEE A FARRUGA

I had just spent an enjoyable evening with my girls and husband watching mindless television. I decided to check my computer for emails and updates. What I found was the news about Robin Williams – and I cried – a lot.

I grew up with his comedy and his quick wit. He made me laugh so very much. Mork and Mindy was one of my absolute favorite shows growing up. I was 13 years old. It had a huge impact on me. I have always stuck to his comedic roles likes Mrs. Doubtfire and The Birdcage. I have never been able to watch any of his serious work. Why? Because I knew he battled demons that I didn't want to see in his serious face.

Because I see it every time my husband has a dark day due to the same demon or my youngest has a down time because she's inherited her dad's depression. I know the constant fight that's involved. I know Robin Williams fought the good fight for all his 63 years. I cried because he lost the fight. Depression won.

 

I don't generally swear but... Fuck Depression!

COURTNEY LOCKHART

In her official statement, Susan Schneider asked that we not focus on her late husband’s death. Instead, we should focus on “the countless moments of joy and laughter he gave to millions.” 

So here goes: 

When I was a kid, It was Aladdin sing-a-longs in the car, Hook screenings with my cousins, and learning the Batty Rap at recess with my best friend- I still remember most of the words to all of these to this day.

When I was a teenager, It was watching Live on Broadway for the 23rd time in my buddy’s basement. We threatened to hold an intervention to get him to watch something else, but never did.

When I was in school it was watching Awakenings to discuss ethics, What Dreams May Come in philosophy class and Flubber on the field trip coach bus. 

As an adult, it was listening to him discuss his humanity, flaws and struggles on various podcasts and talk shows, then watching my young nieces and nephew discover the magic of his movies for the first time. 

Unlike most artists that I have mourned, Robin Williams didn’t represent a singular phase of my life. His talent and brilliance were a constant. The idea that he is gone is difficult to process and it just doesn’t seem fair. 

EMILY PLUNKETT

This one hurts.

Beyond the fact that it’s Robin Williams that passed – like, THE Robin Williams who has made us piss our pants laughing for the past 40 odd years – I cannot get over the fact that we lost another soul to depression. 

As much as we didn’t know him personally, we knew his work.  For children of the ‘90’s and beyond, he is Mrs. Doubtfire, Alan Parrish, Peter Banning and the Genie. Mork, Adrian Cronauer, Patch, Sean Maguire to fans of his generation and his plethora of critically acclaimed awards.  When an artist encompasses so much of our pop culture spectrum, we feel the loss.  The world is crying right now.  I know this because my social media feeds have exploded with tributes from fans and personal friends of the actor.  

What I noticed immediately is that all the posts I’ve read are filled with reminders that we should never take depression for granted.  And I couldn’t agree more.  I’ve been there.  I know that pain and have come back from the brink; and now the whole world is reminded on such a deeply personal level that the pain of depression is so powerful and encompassing.  Williams probably knew what he had as a husband and a loving father, whose last post to Instagram was a photo of himself and his daughter as a child.  But when you’re in that much pain, it all flies out the window, and internal lies of depression takes over. 

It’s so real for so many of us, and yet it takes the death of an international superstar for us to have this conversation. 

Let us hope that this heartbreak will lead to more who suffer from mental illness and depression to seek help and for the discussion of suicide to break free of its taboo so that we don’t have to lose another beautiful spirit.  After all, the next spirit the world loses won’t be famous, but someone will have loved it as much as the world loved Robin Williams; and the cycle of heartbreak will repeat

THEA NIKOLIC

I am deeply saddened by this loss of a great talent. He was a man a tremendous abilities that the world will sorely miss.

If you, or someone you know, are battling depression or anxiety you can call the Distress Centre of Ottawa and Region at 613-238-3311.

Geek Girl Review: Avengers Vs X-Men

CLASH OF THE TITANS – REVIEW OF AVENGERS VS X-MEN
By Lee A. Farruga

Most of my exposure to superheroes is via television and movies. I have seen all the X-men movies, the Avengers movies, Spiderman, Wolverine, the first season of S.H.I.E.L.D. etc. etc. You get the picture. The graphic novels I've read lately have been horror, scifi and real life story based. So when I received this latest graphic novel to review I actually did a double take. Not only is it the first superhero based comic or graphic novel I've gotten to read in a very long time, it's also jam packed with an incredible array of old and new characters, some I'd never before heard of.

Scott Summers aka Cyclops is bound and determined to make sure the “mutant messiah”, a young teen named Hope, fulfills her destiny as host to the cosmic Phoenix. The same one that destroyed Jean Grey. He believes it will save the mutant race and create a new world for them. The Avengers don't agree with Scott's vision and vow to stop Hope, Scott and any other X-Men who get in their way as they try to save the world from ultimate destruction.

That's really all of the story I can tell you without giving away important plotlines. Of course, I can also tell you that the story is much more complicated, that, as the title implies, it involves a battle of epic proportions, that you will never see this many superheroes in action in one story ever again, that the story is also brutal and there are a few surprise deaths, YES, I said deaths. On the lighter side, the illustrations are gorgeous. They range from retro 1950's colouring and style to ultra modern. Basically, the whole thing is brilliant and explosive.

I can also tell you that this graphic novel is the gateway to a new Marvel universe that I'm very excited about. I do believe I'm about to start reading a lot more comic books in the future. If you would like to get your hands on a copy of Avengers vs X-Men, you can find it at the Comic Book Shoppe on Bank Street.

Lee A. Farruga is known as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy, and loves to help people achieve their goals, whatever that might be. She can also be found reviewing books, games, movies and more at geekygodmother.ca. Also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk, Lee created and manages Steampunk Canada. When she finds spare time, Lee does background acting for television and movies, and enjoys geeky activities with family and friends.

Geek Girl Review: Strangers in Paradise by Terry Moore

STRANGERS IN PARADISE – 20 YEARS LATER AND STILL A CLASSIC
by Lee A. Farruga

When the original comic first came out, author Neil Gaiman himself had nothing but praise for this story about love, sex, and relationships with other human beings.

In 2004, Strangers in Paradise was put together into its first Pocket Edition. The series continued until 2007 when its story concluded. However, as recently as 2012 there has been talk of another story being written as a novel.  

Although it's been over 10 years since the first Pocket Edition, and over 20 years since the first story with main characters Katchoo, Francine and David, this series is still relevant to readers today.

Human nature, and our connection to others, is the backbone of these ageless stories. Katchoo provides a little mystery and Francine a little humour, but mainly there is a lot of tears and questions about who and what they really want. These black and white tales of inner discovery are drawn and written by Terry Moore. He has done a wonderful job of keeping the characters true to life, in both the situations in which they find themselves, and also their individual attibutes. Each character has physical features you'll see walking down your street. In other words, your average person. A reader can get close to these characters because you can believe they are real. They are not barbie dolls, action figures or superheroes.

The Pocket Edition books are still available today, and if you like real people and everyday love stories, with a wonderful visual component, then take a look at Strangers in Paradise.

You can find it at The Comic Book Shoppe on Bank Street.

Lee A. Farruga is known as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy, and loves to help people achieve their goals, whatever that might be. She can also be found reviewing books, games, movies and more. Also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk, Lee created and manages Steampunk Canada. When she finds spare time, Lee does background acting for television and movies, and enjoys geeky activities with family and friends.

Fake Geek Girl: Lee's Perspective

FAKE GEEK GIRL BY LEE A FARRUGA

IN MY DAY...

Way back in my day, back in the 70's when I was in high school, there was no such thing as a “fake geek girl”. There were geeks. Now mind you, the vast majority were boys. It was still a time of pink and blue, and gender specific roles. But a few of us young ladies didn't play by the rules.

I liked what my guy friends liked. I had more boy friends (NOT boyfriends) than girl friends and the guys were all geeks. We listened to albums of Monty Python skits. We went to see Star Wars, King Kong, Raiders of The Lost Ark and ET. We even dressed as characters from The Hobbit – when it was still only a book, and the only place to wear our costumes was to our school's Halloween dance.

I probably did stand out as the only girl, but the attention I got from my geek friends was simply how cool it was that I enjoyed all the “odd” things they were into. And while my girlfriends didn't quite understand the attraction to all things geek, they never once thought I was hanging out with the boys for any other reason than I was just as much a geek as them.

I've tried to stay away from this mess about “fake geek girls”. All I've read is either people complaining about those using the term “geek” to draw attention to themselves, or others complaining that no girl can be as geeky as a guy. As to the first complaint - there will always be those who call themselves whatever the current popular term is to gain attention, guys as well as girls. But there are only a few of them compared to those who just want to enjoy their passion. As for the boys complaining that girls can't be geeks, you all need to go live in a different time period – like the 1950s. Obviously you didn't get the memo that girls can be whatever they want nowadays. Those complainers are simply bullies, and it's the small that bark the loudest to make themselves feel big.

It shouldn't matter how you enjoy your geekdom or how much you know about it, whether it's gaming, movies, cosplay, or whatever. If someone loves something, leave them alone to enjoy it.

Lee A. Farruga is known as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy, and loves to help people achieve their goals, whatever that might be. She can also be found reviewing books, games, movies and more. Also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk, Lee created and manages Steampunk Canada. When she finds spare time, Lee does background acting for television and movies, and enjoys geeky activities with family and friends.

Geek Girl Review: Saga, a fan-favourite comic book

by Lee A Farruga

REVIEWING 'SAGA', A FAN FAVOURITE 

It's an old story. A man and woman in love, but they're from different worlds. Then they have a baby. She is the apple of their eye and a perfect blend of them both. She's got her mom's wings and her dad's horns.

Oh yeah, when I say they come from different worlds I mean it. Alana comes from the largest planet in the galaxy – Landfall, and Marko comes from its moon – Wreath. Not only do they literally come from different worlds, but these worlds are at war and have been for generations. We're talking Romeo and Juliet in space – with robots and magic.

Saga, Volume 1 is a collection of the first set of comics that tell the story of fighters Alana and Marko, who leave the war behind and start a family instead.

The whole story starts with little Hazel's birth and then continues with bounty hunters (freelancers) and groups on both sides of the war trying to eliminate the happy couple and retrieve their “mutt”. All Alana and Marko want is a quiet spot in the universe to settle down. Is that too much to ask? Apparently it is.

One of my favourite parts is a small one, but it's a great example of the tone of this epic story. A seahorse creature, an agent, is speaking to freelancer “The Will” through space and time. The combination of surreal alien and the words that come out of its mouth - “Hey you, your signal sucks. Where are you?” - makes this scene more grounded. And that's how the whole story plays out. Surreal one moment and down-to-earth the next.

And by the way... this is a very adult story. Absolutely NOT for children. Sex and violence and no holds barred. But it fits the crazy fantastic story by Brian K. Vaughan which, I must say, is quite the feat. He has also done a fine job of creating characters that are not entirely good or evil, but many shades of grey.

The artwork by Fiona Staples is phenomenal. There are some very imaginative creatures in this story, including a very large cat who can tell when someone is lying, and a sweet teen babysitter who also happens to be dead (and has her bottom half missing). Even the wings on Alana's people and the horns on Marko's are all really different in design. There is a lot of imagination and detail throughout the whole volume.

It's a fabulous piece of writing and art, and definitely worth reading. Get your own copy at The Comic Book Shoppe on Bank Street.

Bio:

Lee A. Farruga is known as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy, and loves to help people achieve their goals, whatever that might be. She can also be found reviewing books, games, movies and more. Also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk, Lee created and manages Steampunk Canada. When she finds spare time, Lee does background acting for television and movies, and enjoys geeky activities with family and friends.

The Massive by Brian Wood: A Geek Girl Review

by Lee A. Farruga

COMIC BOOK REVIEW: THE MASSIVE BY BRIAN WOOD

Storyline without Superheroes. This was the first thing that struck me about The Massive - the first volume of comic books collected together in graphic novel style by Dark Horse about a conservationist ship and its crew after the “Crash”turns the world into a very different place.

The new world is post-apocalyptic, but it's real. It's possible. All the natural catastrophes that happen in a one year period in The Massive are really happening right now, but at a much slower pace. The characters are also possible. Mag - a grown up child soldier, Callum - an ex-military ex-corporate mercenary turned pacifist, and a number of average joes and students wanting to help the environment. They all joined the crew of the Kapital before the Crash and now most don't have a home to return to. Remember, there are no superheroes. Ok, there is one mysterious crew member, Mary, but she still doesn't do anything too out of the ordinary.

Social, economic, and environmental collapse creates chaos. This is where their story begins. It tells three stories really. The first is Kapital's search for its sister ship The Massive. The second includes all the flashback stories of the main characters explaining how they came to be on the Kapital. The last and most important is incredibly simple and honest. How does a conservationist action group continue its mandate in such extreme circumstances. How do they remain pacifists in a new world of chaos, fear and violence? It's fantastic storytelling.

I'd be off my nut if I didn't also mention the artwork. Great mix of comic book and realism. All the natural disasters are beautifully terrifying. The colouring, in particular, really stands out. It is subdued and makes me think of different sunset colours during different seasons and weather. Not sure if the artist was thinking this while they were working on it, but it's perfect.

It's not in your face horror, supernatural, or scifi, but The Massive is a wonderful story of “what if”. This would be an ideal “text” book for a class on environmental issues, activism, or human nature. It would really get students interested in the subject matter. But, on it's own, it's also just a super read.

Interested? You can find it at The Comic Book Shoppe.

Lee A. Farruga is known as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy and loves to help people achieve their goals, whether it's organizing a home or business, editing a book for publication, promoting a pet project, planning an event, or reviewing books, games, movies and more. She is also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk. She created and manages Steampunk Canada. In her spare time she does background acting for television and movies, and finds time to spend with family and friends enjoying geeky activities.

A Steampunk Primer by the Canadian Queen of Steam

STEAMPUNK 101 

by Lee A Farruga

Members of Steampunk Ottawa and the Toronto Steampunk Society.

The term “steampunk” has been around since it was first coined by author K.W. Jeter in the 1980s. Before it had a name, at least to me, it meant Victorian era science fiction starting with the stories of H.G. Wells, Jules Verne and other authors from that period. Their tales incorporated technology advanced far beyond what they had at that time. Today the steampunk movement has outgrown the original stories and fantastical journeys and has created its own inspired by theVictorian era, but incorporating today's technology and that of our possible future.

And whereas Victorian era science fiction was based in jolly old England, steampunk today is international. There are artists, musicians, movies, makers, groups and more to be found in every country. The internet and social media have helped it grow by leaps and bounds, in particluar over the last 5 years.

Steampunk really took hold here in Canada in 2009. In 2010 Steampunk Canada was created. It exists as a hub for all the groups across Canada. This community space supports them with ideas, promotion and information, it is also a place for the individual steampunk seeker to find groups, events, and others with the same love for this genre/community. It promotes and supports our home grown steampunk artists, writers, makers and costumers, and works to educate the general public about steampunk in Canada.

Currently I am preparing something for a huge worldwide online event with steampunks from Japan, Europe, South America, the US, Mexico, Australia, New Zealand, the UK and many more stops on the map. We are a supportive community that loves to welcome newcomers.

If you want to get involved it's quite simple. There is no wrong or right. It's about using your imagination and having fun. Go to Steampunk Canada for more information. Cheers!

Lee A. Farruga is known locally as everyone's Geeky Godmother. She has many talents, lots of energy and she loves to help people achieve their goals, whether it's organizing a home or business, editing a book for publication, promoting someone's pet project, planning an event, or reviewing books, games, movies and more. She is also known internationally as the Canadian Queen of Steampunk. She created and runs Steampunk Canada. In her spare time she does background acting for television and movies, and finds time to spend with family and friends enjoying geeky activities.